A Kentuckian wanted to join the Marines and fly helicopters. On his first
training assignment the instructor said, "Ok Kentuckian, fire her up and take
her to 100 feet." The Kentuckian did. "OK Kentuckian get her up to 1000 ft."
The Kentuckian easily accomplished this too. "Ok Kentuckian, 2000 ft." The
Kentuckian got the copter up there and then suddenly they fell. Just before
hitting the ground the instructor said, "Kentuckian, you were doing so good.
What happened?" The Kentuckian replied, "I got cold so I turned the fan off."
Submitted by Anne Blythe of
Evansville, IN:
Some Kentuckians were setting up a naivity scene for Christmas Eve church
services. The Hoosier minister walked by and said, "That nativity scene looks
pretty good, but why are the three wise men wearing firefighters' hats?" "Don't
you know nothin' about the Bible?" one of the Kentuckians asked. "Scripture
says, 'The wise men came from AFAR!'"
Two Kentuckians were talking to each other the other day, and one asked the
other, “Where are you going to college?”
“Yale.”
“WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO COLLEGE?”
Submitted by Pete Lamp of
Waterloo, IN:
A tornado
passed through Kentucky. It did $10 million worth of improvements.
Submitted by Dave Royse of
Louisville, KY:
A guy in a UK
sweatshirt and his dog walk into a bar. He asks the bartender, 'Hey, my dog and
I are big Wildcat fans, can we watch the football game?' Bartender says OK, and
a few minutes later UK kicks a field goal. The dog jumps up on the bar and does
a dance then high fives everyone at the bar. Bartender says, "Geez, what the
heck's he do when they score a touchdown?' Dog's owner says: 'I dunno. I've
only had him 6 years."
Submitted
by Dexter F. of South Bend:
Q: How do you
kill a Kentuckian?
A: Nail his
boots to the floor and play "Turkey in the Straw".
Submitted by Phil of Indianapolis:
Why did they build the first bridge over the Ohio River between Kentucky and Indiana?
So the people from Kentucky could swim over in the shade.
Submitted by Amanda of Indianapolis:
Q. Why isn't the show CSI in Kentucky?
A. Because Kentuckians have no teeth and all have the same DNA.
Submitted by Dick of Muncie:
Q: What do they call a good-looking, intelligent female in Kentucky?
A: A Tourist.
Submitted by Stephan of
Elizabeth, IN:
A Kentucky State trooper pulled
over a pickup on I-75. The trooper asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied,
"Bout whut?
Submitted by Bill Andrews of Evansville:
How can you tell if a Kentuckian is married? There's dried
tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup truck.
Submitted by Leonard Burton of Wilmington, NC
Q: Why do Kentucky Basketball players rarely go to the pros?
A: They don't like the cut in pay
No joke needed this week. A Lexington, Kentucky TV station reports that
Abercrombie &
Fitch is selling
two t-shirts with slogans that make fun of Kentucky. Here are the links:
