21-15 just not Gittin’-R-Dun

Coach Tyrone kicked to the curb as Irish look to regain former glory

    By Biff Stevens, THG Sports

December 1, 2004

In the no-brainer of the week news, Notre Dame decided Wednesday to 86 unpopular football coach Tyrone Willingham. If anyone didn’t see this coming, you just chose to ignore the facts.

In all actuality, the man was lucky to be back this season. There were serious rumblings last year after a 5-7 season; alumni were calling for his head then. Even worse than that is this year: Notre Dame has to settle for the Insight Bowl. Maybe IU, Illinois, or Kentucky would be happy being selected for this bottom feeder bowl, but not the Irish. They play in Orange and Sugar Bowls, even Cotton Bowls, not one of the Johnny-come-lately bowls.

In discussing the Irish’s postseason plans, Tyrone fell into what I like to call the ‘fallacy of continuous positivism.’  Many coaches make the mistake of thinking the most important thing is to be positive all the time—that’s absolutely the wrong position. If your team is laying an egg, sometimes you need to pull a Bill Parcells and let them know it.  This is probably one reason why his team had sub par performances (see Mike Davis).

For example, after finding out his team will be playing in a reconfigured baseball stadium seating 42,000 for the holidays, Coach Tyrone said “"We’re excited and I think our young men are excited.”   That’s an amazing statement. No one goes to Notre Dame to play in the Insight Bowl; players go there to compete for National Championships. If you wanted to settle for the lower bowls of the world, I would surmise you’d just go to Toledo or Western Michigan instead— the academics are easier and there are more young coeds at those institutions.  If I’m Father Malloy, I’m just shaking my head in disbelief thinking “did my football coach really just say he was excited about the Insight Bowl?”

First sign that the demise of Notre Dame Football is more than just a blip on the map: the Irish used to cockily turn down bowls of this caliber. It was beneath them to resort to a minor bowl after a poor season. Now they embrace the minor bowls. That speaks volumes.

One of the cardinal rules in the lawless world of college football is Thou Shalt Not Lose to Thy Rival Year In and Year Out.  Happened to John Cooper. Good coach, won a lot of games, but could not for the life him beat Michigan.  You can cheat, have recruitment violations, academic fraud, etc. etc., but you simply can not get embarrassed by your rival on prime time TV for the third straight year.  Coach Ty had to learn that the hard way. You simply can’t let USC obliterate you when the whole country is watching, and by the way, what was he doing letting Purdue beat him on his home field for the first time in a coon’s age?

Don’t feel too bad for ol’ Tyrone. He’ll be coaching again real soon, just not in South Bend.  He’s a decent coach, and would be good for a mid-level BCS team (it pains me to classify a team that way, but…).  I’m sure many Hoosiers would welcome him with open arms down in Bloomington to replace our current Notre Dame flunky as coach (see Gerry DiNardo).

I’m just disappointed the firing preempted the planned campus gathering of those wishing to protest the train wreck that is Fighting Irish football. What a great country when you get people together to protest the suckiness of your football team. Just think of the opportunity that was taken away from all of these misguided souls—they were robbed of the chance of telling their grandchildren “I didn’t fight in Iraq or Afghanistan, I didn’t do anything for social change, but dammit I let the administration know I was sick of mediocre football at Notre Dame.”

Take solace Irish fans, I think of as last week Lou Holtz is available. Well, good luck Coach Tyrone, just wish your stay in Indiana could have been a little bit more pleasant!

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